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Showing posts from January, 2012

Inter Marriage bruhaha!

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A Dagomba girl got married to a Moshie man & went to Ouaga with him. She can't speak Moshie. Each time she wants to buy chicken legs (drum stick. lol), she would lift her skirt & show her thighs to enable the seller understand her. This went on for sometimes. One day she wanted to buy banana, she took her husband to the shop. Do you Know Why? . . . . . . . . Because he speaks Moshie.. Lol!
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Funny Q & A!

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1. Someone calls you at 2:00a .m and asks,"Are you sleeping? Ans: "No! I'm picking beans." 2. When its raining and someone notices you going out yet they ask, are you going out in this rain? Ans: "No! In the next one." 3. You are making out with your girlfriend then you start pulling her panties then she asks; what are you trying to do? Ans: "I want to wash it for u." 4. They see you coming out of the bathroom wet, yet they ask, "Did you just have a bath?" Ans: "No, i fell into the toilet bowl." 5. You're standing in front of the elevator on the ground floor going to your office, yet they ask, "Are you going up??" Ans: "No, i'm waiting for my Office to come down and get me." 6. Your boyfriend comes home with abunch of flowers, and you still ask, "Are those flowers? Ans: "No baby, they're carrots!" 7. You are in the toilet and lock the door and someone knocks, aski...
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Confession booth!

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A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her nine year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch. The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her Lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy was in there already. The little boy says, "Dark in here." The man says, "Yes, it is." Boy - "I have a baseball." Man - "That's nice." Boy - "Want to buy it?" Man - "No, thanks." Boy - "My dad's outside." Man - "OK, how much?" Boy - "$250" In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover met in the closet. Boy - "Dark in here." Man - "Yes, it is." Boy - "I have a baseball glove." The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?" Boy - "$750". A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, le...
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Tit for tat!

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A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife. It read: "Dear wife, You must realize that you are 54 years old and I have certain needs which you are no longer able to satisfy. I am otherwise happy with you as a wife, and I sincerely hope you will not be hurt or offended to learn that by the time you receive this letter, I will be at the Grand Hotel with my 18-year-old teaching assistant. I'll be home before midnight. - Your Husband" When he arrived at the hotel, there was a faxed letter waiting for him that reads as follows: "Dear Husband, you too are 54 years old, and by the time you receive this, I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with the 18-year-old pool boy. Being the brilliant mathematician that you are, you can easily appreciate the fact that 18 goes into 54 a lot more times than 54 goes into 18. Don't wait up." Your wife
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Whistling Pussy?

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Joe is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt. Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs. To his delight, he realises she has gone without underwear. The blonde realises he is staring and inquires, "Are you looking at my pussy?" "Yes, I'm sorry," says Joe and promises to avert his eyes. "It' s quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you." Sure enough the pussy blows him a kiss. Joe, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the wonder pussy can do. "I can also make it wink," says the woman. Joe stares in amazement as the pussy winks at him. "Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat. Joe moves over and is asked, "Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?" Stunned, Joe replies, "Good grief! Can it whistle, too?" Lol!
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Don't give up loving!

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There was this man who saw a scorpion floundering around in the water. He decided to save it by stretching out his finger, but the scorpion stung him. The man still tried to get the scorpion out of the water, but the scorpion stung him again. Another man nearby told him to stop saving the scorpion that kept stinging him. But the man said, "It is the nature of the scorpion to sting. It is my nature to love. Why should I give up my nature to love just because it is the nature of the scorpion to sting?" LESSON: Don't give up loving? Don't give up your goodness even if the people around you sting you. The greatness comes not when things are always going well for you. But the greatness comes when you're really tested, when you take some knocks, some disappointments, when sadness comes.. . Because only if you've been in the deepest valley can you ever know how magnificent it is to be on the highest mountain.
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The pigs of our time! By Abdul-Latif Ahmed

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One night, Mr. Liberal passes out drunk, creating the perfect opportunity for the people to rebel. The people were so hungry that they broke into the Castle. When Mr. Liberal and his men try to whip them into submission, the people ran them off the Castle. The people burnt all reminders of their former bondage but agreed to preserve the Jubilee Palace “as a hen‘s coop.” Snow came up with Seven Commandments. These were: 1. Whoever rides on an elephant is an enemy. 2. Whoever is an Umbrella, is a friend. 3. No person shall work in the Jubilee Palace. 4. No person shall drink "atyre" (tea). 5. No person shall buy an aeroplane. 6. No person shall kill any other. 7. All persons are equal. Every weekend, Snow and Napo led a meeting of some Ghanaians. The Socialists were the most intelligent people, so they thought up resolutions for the other people to debate. Soon after, the Socialists set up a study-center for themselves. Snow embarked on various campaigns for so...
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Naughty brothers!

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Two naughty brothers, Leon and Deon, stole a bag of oranges from their home and decided to go to the nearest cemetery to share the loot. As they were scaling the big gate to enter the cemetery, two oranges fell out of the bag and are left behind at the gate. A heavily drunk man on his way from a local tavern passes near the cemetery gate and hears the following: One for me, one for you. One for me, one for you. He immediately sobers up and runs as fast as he can to the local priest. Pastor Come with me to witness God and Satan sharing corpses at the cemetery. They both run back to the cemetery gate and the voices continue: One for me, one for you. Suddenly one voice said: " What about the two at the gate?" The priest was the first to run for his life! Ha ha ha. Lol
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Three drunkards & a taxi driver!

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Three men were drunk. They stopped a taxi. The taxi driver figured that they were drunk, he just switched on the engine & switched it off & told them, " we have arrived". The 1st guy gave him money, 2nd guy said thanks but the 3rd guy slapped him. The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that none of them must have realized that the car didn't move an inch. so he asked, "what was that for?" The Guy Replied, "control your speed next time. Dude, you almost killed us. Lol!
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Types of girls!

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There are basically "7 TYPES" OF GIRLS, 1. HARD DISK Girls: Remember everything forever. 2. RAM Girls: Forgets about you the moment you turn her off. 3. SCREENSAVER Girls: Just for looking. 4. INTERNET Girls: Difficult to access. 5. SERVER Girls: Always busy when needed. 6.MULTIMEDIA Girls: Makes horrible things looks beautiful. 7. VIRUS: These type of girls are normally called 'WIVES'. Once they enter your system, you cannot control them and they'll make your life a living hell, even after formating!
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ICT for JHS

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If you are looking for  ICT  notes for  JHS , then you are in a right place. This book has been written in accordance with the current syllabus for the  Basic Education   Certificate Examination (B.E.C.E)  for  Junior High Schools (J.H.S) . The book covers the three year syllabus . This book will provide you ICT notes and step by step tutorials with definitions, explanations, examples and illustrations. This book is created to make the teaching and Learning of ICT lively, handy and encourage students to use their phones, tablets and computers for learning. The book will also help you learn anywhere and at anytime. PREVIEW BELOW
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Regular BECE ICT Pasco

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This book contains regular Basic Education Certificate Examination (BECE) Past Questions for Junior High Schools (J.H.S) by West Africa Examination Council (WAEC). Included in this book are Past Questions & Answers for the years: 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022 & 2023. This book, I strongly believe, will bring success to all users who study it carefully. PREVIEW BELOW 
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Gov’t Intervenes As Court Orders Auctioning Of GHANASCO Cars

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The Northern Regional Director of Education, Mohammed Haroon Cambodia has confirmed government will be paying a staggering GHC400,000 as judgment debt to a private citizen in order to stop the auctioning of vehicles belonging to the Ghana Senior High School in Tamale. Government is offering the bailout following a chronic transport difficulty that has hit the school for the last two years after a court order impounded the only bus for students and a brand new official pickup vehicle. Two Nissan patrol vehicles belonging to the Education directorate were also taken by the court. The vehicles were confiscated to be auctioned to pay up salary arrears of a former headmaster of the school who accused the school and education service of injustices including inappropriate dismissal and concealing his promotion letter. Late Lionel Mahama was dismissed as headmaster of the school in 1997. His salary was blocked for years until a CHRAJ ruled in his favor and ordered his reinstateme...
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